you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
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