He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Everclear isn't food dammit
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
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