I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
