found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Randomize
