You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
