youre lurking in front of me
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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