whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Randomize
