i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
