How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
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