I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
