is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
