Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Randomize
