Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
