how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
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