I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Randomize
