why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
