I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
The feeling are messing with the penis
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
