dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Randomize
