So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize