Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
