Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Randomize
