Christians are straight up FREAKS
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Randomize
