I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
