this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
