physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Floor bacon is actually really good
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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