Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
