No stitches, just platelets and will power
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
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