I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
I need help removing her.
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
Randomize
