It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
