she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
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