It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize
