i just google imaged poop.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize
