and next time when you feel me up, do it right
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
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