If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
