David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
