he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
A+ Viking dick
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
