how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
oh god was she eating orange peels again
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize