What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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