i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
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