is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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