I love watching others lives come down to our level.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
Randomize
