at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
