I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Randomize
