dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
