youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
i think my cat just said my name.
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
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