So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
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