I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
