I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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