at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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