i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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