I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize
