Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Randomize
