tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Randomize
