whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
