Whatcha textin bout Willis?
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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