I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
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